A Little Daiquiri Never Hurt a Thief
by Last Magician of the Century
Summary: Alternate Universe. Hakuba's father had died, and his final wish was for his son to pair up with his aunt in her little organization. Can this goody goody detective learn to love a life of crime? HakubaAkako and hints of HakubaAoko because of that blasted
1. Let's Get Started Now

Kid: This one is gonna be crazy. Basically in this one, Horse-head joins the Black Org…God this is gonna be odd. I guess this is why it's called an Alternate Universe fic, huh?

My muse: A dream I had where Horse-head joined the Black Org and basically let his mental health fall down the drain. I think he was about to shoot Akako when I woke up.

Warnings: Violence, alcohol, lust, shallow wenches, cursing, Shinichi bashing, overrun on testosterone, and confused Hakubas are all featured in this fanfic. There is no way I could put this up as anything other than mature. Who knows? I might even put in a lemon if I feel like it.

Begin Story-

Saguru Hakuba looked in the mirror, scowling bitterly at his reflection. What on Earth possessed him to join an organized crime ring?

Oh. That's right. His aunt.

Beautiful acting extraordinaire Chris Vineyard was his father's younger sister. Upon his recent death, he requested that his son joined the Organization for "sentimental reasons".

Saguru wasn't sure if he didn't hear correctly, and the attorney had really said "Semi-mental reasons". It made sense to him.

"Oh, Saguru-chan!" Chris said, hugging him tightly. "You look so handsome in your new suit! Black is definitely your color. Now, let's go and meet my friends, okay?"

Saguru rolled his eyes and joined his aunt in her very nice fire red Mercedes.

He leaned back into the gray interior of the back seat and just stared at the blue eye at the left side of the rearview mirror.

"Saguru-chan, you're seventeen now, right?" Chris said brightly, like any aunt who hasn't seen her nephew in ages. "Do you have a good car to keep you running?"

"I actually prefer to walk or take public transportation," he replied. "So there's no reason to get a car."

Chris shook her head. "I'll import you a nice one. How about a white Saleen S7? It'll give you the whole James Bond feel. We'll even put a CD player in. Oh, you'd be the most popular boy at Ekoda High. Nothing's too good for my little nephew."

"Can you even afford it with this Benz?"

"Of course. You will be able to too. With your taskforce cop salary and the money you'll get for just being on call in our organization. You'll be rich, Saguru-chan! If you get any addictions or girlfriends, or both for that matter, you'll be able to take care of both of them. Now let's think of your code name…"

They arrived in a bar within a half an hour. "You know, I am a minor, I shouldn't be here."

"But you're with a legal guardian. You're safe."

Saguru glanced warily at a table where four young women, all pretty enough, but wearing clothes a bit too revealing for his taste, were leering at him.

"What about from them?"

"Oh, Saguru-chan, meet Sakura, Ayame, Ume, and Ren," Chris introduced them, gesturing to each girl. "They're going to be BIG fans of yours at the heists."

Sakura tossed a black lock of hair over her shoulder. "I'm already a fan, Hakuba-san. I've been wanting to meet you up close and _personal_." She winked and gave an emphasis on personal that made him stand rigid. She couldn't have been under twenty-one; she could be in trouble for saying those things.

Chris just laughed. "These girls act as our messengers, so no one can trace us. Now onto our group…"

Chris sat gingerly, then Saguru unsurely sat next to her and looked at the group. They all indeed looked like murderers and convicts, it was just as bad to be seen with them as associating with them.

When the waiter came, they all introduced themselves with their drink of choice.

"Vodka. The usual."

"Gin. One shot to start."

"Jackal. Best you can make."

"Vermouth."

"Tequila."

Saguru paused before ordering. "Daiquiri."

When the waiter left, Ume leaned over. "Daiquiri. That's a good name for you."

Saguru turned his head to her questioningly.

Chris responded. "I know isn't it? He's sweet, and can give you a wonderful high on a hard day, but if you abuse him and his strengths, he'll make you regret it and have a good time doing it."

Saguru buried his head. Why was he so popular with _criminals_? Shouldn't the Kaitou Kid be more popular than he?

The one who introduced himself as Gin leaned in his chair. "Aren't you worried he will tell his friends about us?"

Chris smiled. "Blood is thicker than crime, isn't it? This is my precious little nephew. AND he focuses on the Kid, not other crimes."

Saguru shook his head. "I can work on whatever squad I want, Aunt Chris. It just so happens my opinions are held highest in the Kid Taskforce. But…" he sighed, "I can't go against my father's final wishes for me…"

And he said his reason like it was a sin. And to him, it was. He was in a mafia, for God's sake. He could be killing, stealing, blackmailing…basically he was going to have to change his ethics or become a hypocrite. Either way, he was not going to be happy.

When the drinks came, they all began chattering, catching him up on their plans.

"Cool Guy wasn't killed from taking the poison Sherry made, and neither was she," Chris, er, Vermouth said.

"We're currently on a seek and destroy mission for both of them," Tequila said. "And the Kaitou Kid is believed to be after the Pandora Jewel, which-."

"Can shed tears when a comet passes by Earth and held to the moonlight that brings immortality," Saguru recited out of habit. "The Pandora Jewel can also bring its owner slight insanity if one doesn't confine it's abilities correctly. It is also believed that touching the jewel directly on the skin can cause the soul to be absorbed into the jewel for twenty-four hours, and in that time, the dark side of the person is released. Thus the term 'Pandora', who in legends opened a jar or box, depending on which you've read, to release the evils of mankind."

Jackal smirked and took a sip of his drink. "Someone's been doing his homework."

"I have to. The Kaitou Kid expresses interest in it, and he might go for it."

The members of the Organization chuckled. "What are you gonna do in this throng, Daiquiri?"

Saguru shrugged and pretended to take a sip of his drink. "Hope you guys are intending to help me keep the Kid **_alive_** and get him the needle."

Vermouth held her wine to the light. "It sounds reasonable. After all, it'll give us a chance to talk to him through our little Daiquiri in the interrogation room. Oh, sorry. We should be treating you like an adult, Daiquiri. You are very mature for a seventeen-year-old."

The members of the Black Organization laughed and talked like old friends all through the evening and passed midnight.

Saguru had actually finished his daiquiri, but didn't order another before they left.

"So, did you like our little organization?" Chris asked sweetly.

Saguru leaned against the back of the passenger seat. "They seemed…human."

Chris laughed. "Did you expect maybe a bunch or soulless assassins? Please."

"Actually, that was exactly what I was expecting." His head was spinning from the rum and the lemon. It was his first alcoholic intake, and the slight spinning wasn't exactly his idea of fun. What he didn't get was why he couldn't wipe the smirk off his face.

"This was your first drink, wasn't it? Don't worry, the buzz won't be there next time. Just don't drink it everyday, or you'll get addicted. And drink lightly and socially, mostly when it's just the six of us. An occasional nip is always wonderful. But when you start to feel like doing something crazy, you've had more than enough. I usually stop when I feel like flirting with the waiter." Chris looked at her nephew and matched his smirk. "You had fun, otherwise you wouldn't be smirking like that. Oh, before I forget, open the glove compartment."

Saguru obeyed and a gun was apparent. "What?"

"That's your piece. You'll need it. It isn't loaded because you don't need it loaded."

"I'll get caught when I shot this."

"Tell me, dear Saguru-chan. Are you familiar with Zodiac?"

"The American serial killer? Yes."

"Why was it so hard to catch him, even with the letters, Saguru-chan?"

"The bullets have no…grooves."

"That's why you won't get caught either. I know no one but us knows about that secret room in your house. That piece is for working the Black Org, so hide it there until time comes to use it. We'll supply the bullets you need. But when copping, just stick to your normal piece, okay?"

Saguru spun the chamber admiringly. "Thank you, Aunt Chris…"

"Not a problem, my precious Daiquiri."

End Chapter-

Side Notes: The Messengers, like the main group of the Black Org, all have a common theme. Sakura means Cherry Blossom, Ayame means Iris, Ume means Plum Blossom, and Ren means Water Lily. They will also be called the Four Flowers in later chapters.

I had daiquiri before. It was sweet with a kick. Very good. I can't wait 'til I'm twenty-one and can have it again legally.

On the Pandora Jewel, there really was such a thing, but it went missing a while back. I used information on the real Pandora and the one from the show.

Zodiac killer- a very famous American serial killer that shot people when a certain sign was visible in the sky. All the people had a different Zodiac sign, thus he called himself Zodiac. He most often came behind the person and shot them. The bullets left no markings, which is very odd due to the usually unique carvings in the lead of the bullets received by the gun. This way, no one could track the gun, Zodiac claimed. He even wrote letters bragging this. However, the handwriting didn't find a hand until they caught him. My friend Jen Connley is absolutely obsessed with this case and can tell you anything about Zodiac and Jack. Kinda scary really.

Jen Connley- my friend who believes that Johnny Depp played Jack the Ripper in "Finding Neverland."


	2. Dilemma at the Org

Kid: Huh…one review…Not surprised. This is outlandish even for an Alternate Universe fic. BUT if you ever get the time, check out Operation: Black Org Takedown, written by Heart of Perpetual Ice. Some of my storyline is featured. Especially when they get to England and Rome.

-Begin Chapter-

Saguru awoke with the buzz gone. He silently thanked God, but his nose perked at an unfamiliar smell…

Was someone cooking eggs and bacon?

And onions. Someone was making an omelet.

Mmm…omelet…

Ume's voice sang from the kitchen. "Daiquiri-san! Your breakfast!"

Saguru took a long time before recognizing his new name. When he did, he jumped in surprise, immediately dressed in his school uniform, and went downstairs to investigate why the messenger flower was in his house.

She was just folding the egg and sliding it onto the plate when she spotted and smiled at him. He nodded in acknowledgement, and took his breakfast, grateful he had time for breakfast.

She sat opposite him, violet eyes sparkling in admiration. "Daiquiri-san, you have a message from Vermouth-dono."

A forkful of the egg and its contents was shoved into the detective's mouth, who then listened intently to the blonde beauty.

"She says that there is some delay in your car, and the organization will be meeting at the Kid heist tonight. From there you, Jackal-dono, Vermouth-dono, Gin-dono, and Vodka-san will pick you up. Gin-dono and Vodka-san scare me, so I suggest travelling with your aunt."

Saguru nodded, understanding it completely.

And this was why he couldn't focus at school that day.

At break, he started to go through the plan in his head.

Aoko's angered squeals, Kuroba's constant chuckle and antics, it was all normal. That was until an unusual proposition.

He was sitting at his desk when he noticed someone bending in front of him. A female. Breasts were at eye level.

Mental shutdown. Reboot with last incoming data.

Saguru looked up. "Yes?"

Akako smiled. "Took you long enough…Mind if I sit?"

Saguru shook his head. "If you can find one, I don't mind."

Mental shutdown. Viral spread through the database.

Once again his mind rebooted to the situation. He was alone. In the classroom. With Akako. Who was currently straddling his lap and petting him like a pet.

"I gave up on being the thief's lady…Then I wondered why I wanted a thief when I had a knight?"

"Koizumi…"

A gentle finger was brought to his lips. "I want you as my own, Hakuba-kun…"

For a second he felt strange. Like Akako was casting a spell over him with her movements and words.

But then he shook his head and guided her off.

"Koizumi, I'm quite flattered. Truly. If I was any other man and the matters in my life were not as pressing as they are currently, I would be honored to be…yours. However, my father _died_ two days ago, Koizumi. Give me few more days. I need to straighten matters up before I'm ready for such a commitment…"

However, before he realized it himself, Saguru was tilting his head to her and bending down, lips pressed together tightly, mouth opened as wide as it could be, tongue fighting the red-haired witch's, bodies pressed together mercilessly, slender fingers tangling in his hair.

And of course, Kaito ruined it. "Whoa…getting hot and heavy in here…but during break?"

Saguru let out a low growl before breaking away from the witch. HIS witch. Then he sat down, convincing himself and Kaito that they were just friends who got caught up in the heat of the moment. She was simply "comforting" him from the loss of his beloved family member.

None of them spoke of it during the day.

But that didn't mean that the boys didn't think about it. The heist, Kid got away, and Saguru's reaction times were shot.

At the bar, the Black Organization's Six Elite relaxed with their drinks of choice. That was when he brought up his incident.

Vermouth cheered. "Hallelujah! My nephew has FINALLY reached puberty!"

"Aunty…"

Tequila looked at Vermouth. "This is indeed a very serious situation, Vermouth. This 'Koizumi' girl could get too close to him."

Sakura's eyes followed onto the detective protectively. As if mentally claiming him for next year.

Saguru shuddered.

Gin spoke next. "I say Daiquiri goes for it. He's still a teenager and he can every so often use her if needed."

Saguru stood. "I must get going."

Vodka grabbed his arm through his inverness coat. "Where are you going?"

Saguru said with as much dignity he could muster, "I refuse to be with anyone who speaks about a young lady such as Koizumi like she was a tool."

And with that, he walked out of the bar and made a beeline.

Akako was the one who answered the banging at the door. Who in the hell would be coming to call at two in the morning?

Her eyes widened a little bit when she saw Saguru standing there. "Ha…"

"I want you too, Koizumi."

-End Chapter-

This chapter based on great fanart by Jen. Hakuba is watching Akako sleep in his Holmes outfit, brushing her hair from her face and she wrote at the bottom "I'll never let anyone steal you." Even to me that was sweet.

About Hakuba getting angry about Gin saying to use her…everyone knows Hakuba's the basic British gentleman to his female classmates, right? Right.

No, he didn't sleep with her that night, you perverts! (Mostly directed at HoPI, Jen, and…Ashley…BECAUSE I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS YOU STALKER! WHY ELSE WOULD YOU ASK ABOUT HAKUBA'S SECRET!)

Ashley…my coworker at the office. Swear she's stalking me…


	3. Possession

Just a little bit of sweetness that my friend Alice wrote as a one-shot for A Little Daiquiri. I just wanted to put it up because it is, after all, in the time period of what is going on in it.

Warning, there's a bit of citrus in it. After all, this is titled "Possession."

Thank you, Ali!

We would've never thought you'd take an interest…

-Begin Chapter-

Saguru woke up an hour after he came to her house. He just couldn't bring himself to sleep that night.

Personally, he blamed it on that warm, soft being against his chest and in his arms.

He looked down and let himself inhale her scent. She smelled a bit of lavender. Why would she need to relax?

Saguru tilted her head slightly and smirked. She was sexy when awake, but she was just plain adorable while she was sleeping, her eyes closed, her lips parted ever so slightly just like he should be…

His lips finished his sentence when they slowly descended onto hers. Cinnamon. He rather enjoyed that flavor, and he parted and pulled down her jaw a little and then allowed his tongue to take the flavor in, letting his tongue mingle with hers.

Two pale arms wrapped around his neck and her tongue started to respond to his.

When he finally retreated, he saw a set of burgundy eyes open and a smirk cross her lips. "You're really a great kisser, Hakuba-kun…and those button-down shirts of yours are more comfortable than my nightgown."

A naked leg rose and rested where his waistline began.

"I still don't understand why you wanted it in the first place…"

Akako pulled herself closer to him and just melted into his arms. "You couldn't sleep, could you…"

"Nah…"

Saguru's arms wrapped around her protectively, looking her in her eyes before slowly letting his head fall and his lips meet hers.

Akako sighed and let her hands slide down his chest admiringly. She became very satisfied when a soft groan that met her lips and she pulled back with her trademark smile. "What was that, Hakuba-kun? Hasn't anyone touched you like that?"

Saguru just shook his head before returning to a more tender kiss with his witch, who he knew was making her spell stronger from the day. Especially when he didn't protest when he felt his pants unzipping.

"Poor thing never felt any girl's love…" her hand slid into his pants and boxer to grab him gently, already half-erect. "…I'll just have to change that, won't I?"

All he could do was gasp when she pulled him out, rubbing him slowly at first, eliciting several muffled moans from the detective.

Akako's rubbing became more vigorous and his moan became louder until she muffled them with her lips.

"Three places I can put that…"

Saguru nodded his head but brought himself on top of her, licking and kissing and biting her neck while his hands worked professionally at his shirt buttons, and he was smirking against her skin by time she was clutching his back and breathing in short bursts.

After leaving the fifth button opened, he immediately went for her breasts. He actually liked the sound of surprise when he started to suckle her and nip the delicate flesh.

"Saguru…"

He took her whispering his given name as encouragement and his free hand slid down on her and rested at her panties' elastic band. He hesitated before pulling them down halfway on her thigh and then returning to the risen nub that had been defended by the sateen undergarment.

Akako gasped in surprise and pleasure upon first contact.

He gently made circles with his finger, smirking at her whenever she moaned or arched her hips toward his touch.

The witch got up between her loud moans and pressed another open mouth kiss against her lover. Without him noticing, she clung her legs to his naked waist and swung him about, leaving him looking up desperately from the pillows.

She chuckled softly at his look. "You look like you've been waiting for this all night…"

Saguru didn't say anything, just let his hands rise to his waist to support her.

Akako rose from her lounging pose and slide her panties the rest of the way off and threw them to the ground next to Saguru's discarded tie and house slippers before she rested her knees on either side of his hips.

"Are you sure…" Hakuba asked softly, raising one hand to the base of her head. "This WILL hurt…"

Akako looked down at him lovingly. "Hakuba-kun…"

Akako braced herself with a shuddering breath before she slid down on top of him, gasping for breath and clinging to his pants.

"Are you okay?" Saguru said, rising to her eye level and holding her, bringing himself deeper inside of her.

After few minutes Akako nodded. "It stopped hurting. I'm ready again…"

Saguru nodded and rose his hips, kissing her softly as she had her way with him.

As soon as Akako started to rock, she felt an odd feeling.

"Hakuba-kun…I'm bleeding."

Saguru gave her his all too famous I told you so look. "Go take care of it. I'm not going anywhere. You're just lucky that these aren't my uniform pants." A small smirk found his face and he winked. "I'd have to kill you."

She smirked a little before heading to the bathroom.

When 6:30 rolled around, it found Akako and Saguru, bodies entwined, awakening, ready for the new day.

Akako cuddled for a second.

"I'm keeping your shirt."

-End Chapter-

Well, technically they DID sleep together, but it wasn't long enough for some of us to consider it. But don't worry. They'll get a better citrus chapter later.


End file.
